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What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?

Last Updated: 20.06.2025 07:34

What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?

She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!

He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!

He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .

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One cannot live in the past .

You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.

She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!

Why do atheists want to see God so badly?

You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .

I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.

Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.

Why are some people afraid of monsters?

He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.

He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.

All the time i was locked up.

Why do people keep saying they have evidence and have presented it that proves you're wrong even though they have none and haven't presented anything? Furthermore, what do they think you're wrong about?

And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!

He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.

For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)

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We were not on the streets..

What did i know ?

But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,

How do I write a character’s physical description without it feeling unnatural and clunky? I’m able to describe their hair and body relatively easily because my writing puts emphasis on small movements and fidgeting, but I can’t describe faces.

His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.

So, i spoilt her more .

Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.

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But im an empath, and i help lots of people.

Comes on , in middle age.

I was 9 years of age.

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Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.

As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.

One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.

Are there many people here who suffer from schizophrenia?

As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)

I suffer greatly, because of BPD..

My mum and dad in the seventies!

Is it possible to revive a dead person in real life with black magic?

But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!

And, all my friends down the years ,where users.

He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!

She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.

As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.

We all went to grammer schools

I said to her

He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!

We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.

I was seconnd youngest,

We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!

A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.

I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.

My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.

Im still living with it.

19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.

Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)

I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.

She was in good health!

Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t

Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.

Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.

As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!

I don,t even have a pension.

I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.

He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!

My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.

My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.

Its mostly always from childhood abuse .

Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..

But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!

Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!

Was to survive, this bastard.

I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!

The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!

My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .

It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.

But ive been too sick for many years..

When she asked me how she looked .

Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.

Another so called friend had bit the dust..

I will be 64.

And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .

His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!

I know ,a lot about trauma.

I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.

One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.

He resisted the act ,that day.

Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.

My life is so biszare .

She died at 55 of colon cancer.

.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them

With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.

But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!

Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life

She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.

Put me off passion for life!!

But im dying ,and its too late for me.

I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.

I was writing from the time i was a small child.

My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!

I waited trembling.

And i lived it daily.

This is how, and why children get BPD.

My family never makes their pension either.

Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..

One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)

Thats was my nicest nick name for him

He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!

But, we were locked up after school.

And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!

He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.

I think the readers, may guess!

Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..

This is soul school!.

And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!

5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.

I was very sick at this time too.

He knew the spot.

BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.

I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.

We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.

I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.

But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !

They are buried together, in the same grave..

I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)

She wouldn,t have been !

Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.

Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.

I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.

I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!

Ive learnt so much.

We could never speak unless he spoke to us!

One cannot hold on to bitterness.

As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!

My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.

She loved him until the end.

Who then, do I blame.?

I had hoped to write a book about this .

On the 31st of Jan this month .

As i do to all so called friends.?

Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!

Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.

She was a women, a mother with her own children!.

Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.

And who doesn’t know suffering?

I did it because my mum asked me too!

And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!

I never cut or harmed myself..

Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.

I was scared of men, in general

That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.

She married twice! .

We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..

Why did i forgive my father ?

Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?

Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!

He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.

Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years

I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .

So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.

Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.

The only rule us 5 kids had .

The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,

Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.

I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.

I might have to go back 30 generations or more..

I could never make a relationship work though!

But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).

Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.

Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.

I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor

So whats the point in blame.

It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.

It was going to be , some day.

I couldn’t, believe it.

The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.

Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!

When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!

But it wasn’t much.

And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.

Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!

I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.

I of course replied” arh beautiful!

I write beautiful poetry .

And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)

He was dying to do it , i knew.

I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.

Especially a lifetime of it.

I have no regrets .

But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .

She found it foreign!.

I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers

Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.

She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!

At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.

Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other

Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.

Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.

So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.

Would this be the day?

Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.

(And it was in our own minds.)

The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..

But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.

Where the ultimate outsiders.

Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.

Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..

They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?

Im dying but, im not bitter.